Once in a while on a calm and pleasant night I have this feeling which is both comforting and painful. Comforting in the sense that I underwent those pleasant experiences and met some good people in my life and painful because those moments are now history and no matter what, I cannot get them back.
Today is one of those nights. My evening started as per my normal routine : Came back from work, spent a little time on orkut.com reading the scrapbooks of other people and then browsing through the tv channels ,cooking, eating , talking on the phone etc.. and getting back to bed. But for some reason I couldn't sleep and even today I postponed my plan to call my best friend back in India. I have been making and breaking this promise to myself for quite some time now and I was just wondering the reason for my behaviour. May be I was postponing this because I dont want to make that call and the excuse that Iam busy is just a cover up. And why would I not want to call my once best friend?? and this has setup up a train of thoughts into my memory lane and made me feel nostalgic..
Really, it is quite surprising and shocking what a few years could do to one's life. I dont know how to carry out a 10 minute conversation with the people whom I spent few of my most memorable moments in the past. I am not even sure If I have to work on this and try to maintain my relationships with my friends or just let my life go on and let things happen.
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3 comments:
Kishan, Very good post. I know how you are feeling! I guess we all go throught those feelings at one point or the other. On my last Inida trip I suddenly realized that I can't connect with my friends any more the way I used to. The people I used to hang out with back in 10th, 11th and 12th grade were too boring to talk to. I couldn't convince myself that it was a good change :(
i believe relationships cease to exist where conversations become hard...friends do become aquaintances. i usually move on. it makes life super complicated otherwise. sometimes you just know which friendships (for want of a better word)will last and which ones would'nt...
I was just finishing a write up on the same stuff a couple of days back.
Am abt to leave India and the last thing I want now is to meet friends, especially old ones.
I guess everone moves on and the past is so beautiful that the thought that you can't relive it makes the present contact with person/s very difficult.
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